Oh my! it's been more than a year since my last entry here. My 2017 and 2018 were not my best years. I had a lot of challenges to face. When I look back, these were the years that taught me so much about life and trusting our Lord, Father God despite the challenges.
Though these were not my best years, I still consider it to be my greatest years for I became a child of God. I have accepted Him as my Father God, my Savior, my protector. I became stronger, braver and wiser that I didn't expect myself to be the best version of myself today.
These are the things I've learned (and still learning):*
1. Do not try to please everyone.
2. Love yourself. know your worth.
3. Do not force anyone to stay in your life.
4. Never assume, never expect.
5. It's ok to fail, as long as you learn your lessons.
6. If people want to leave, let them go.
7. This is the hardest one which until now I am struggling: "Learn to forgive and try harder to forget."
8. Love the people who love and who care for you. Appreciate them. Spend more quality time with them.
9. Do not waste your time to those who always treat you to be an option.
10. Believe in God, have a deeper relationship with Him. Lift up to Him all your worries. He loves us, He will never leave us.
11. Be more appreciative and grateful for what you have.
12. Love the people who have helped you get up when you were at your lowest point in life.
I claim that this 2019 will be a great one no matter what kind of challenges I will be facing. This will be great for I know I am stronger beacause of my faith in Him. Thank you Father God for everything. God bless us all.
Saturday, December 29, 2018
Tuesday, June 27, 2017
A Year Before Big 4-0
These are the things I have learned in my 39 years of existence on earth:
1. My mantra now is "ayaw mo, wag mo". You can't please everybody. People are entitled to their opinion, just need to respect it.
2. If you love someone, don't expect the same amount of love in return.
3. Love, respect and trust are the most important ingredients in any relationship.
4. If you're given a task, do it well.
5. If you're given any responsibility, be accountable for it.
6. Don't force someone to like/love you, if they really care for you, it will come naturally.
7. Be mature to face all types of challenges that come your way.
8. You learn things from your mistakes or from your past experience, treasure it.
9. Enjoy life the way you want to live it as long as you know your limitations.
10. Have a sense of responsibility.
11. Have high respect for your parents and you will never go wrong.
12. Have more faith in Him and trust Him for all the happenings in your life whether it's bad or not. Everything happens according to His will.
13. Help those in need even strangers.
14. Show respect to all the people you deal with.
15. If you feel like giving up, kneel down and pray. Only Him who can give you assurance that "everything will be ok".
16. I love it when I make my loved ones happy. Make it a habit to make others happy.
17. Don't forget yourself. Learn to love yourself.
18. Never doubt yourself that you can do anything with the help of Almighty Father.
19. Reconnect to your long lost friends. Treasure the friendship.
20. Share your blessings.
21. Have someone in your life who can be trusted of all the things you are going through. It relieves when you get to release the burden in your heart.
22. Have "me" time. Know yourself deeper.
23. Write the things you want in life. Your goals. Your dreams. Before you know it, you have achieved it already.
24. Be grounded. Be humble.
25. Have a grateful heart.
26. Focus on things you like to achieve.
27. Be kind always.
28. Try things out of your comfort zone.
29. Be a good listener.
30. Be vocal about your feelings.
31. If you are sad, let it be. Anyway, it will pass.
32. Look back to where you came from and be grateful to those people who have helped you become the person you are now.
33. Be patient to your kids. Let them play and enjoy their childhood.
34. Fulfill your long-time dream.
35. Always make yourself happy.
36. Be patient to all other people you deal with.
37. Always pray for His guidance in everything that you do.
38. Be sensitive for the feelings of others.
39. Learn things from others' past experiences.
I thank God for giving me the kind of life I have right now, for the gift of family, for being the person I am now. I pray for good health, more happiness, peace of mind, lots of love for me, my family, my friends and those who are in need.
1. My mantra now is "ayaw mo, wag mo". You can't please everybody. People are entitled to their opinion, just need to respect it.
2. If you love someone, don't expect the same amount of love in return.
3. Love, respect and trust are the most important ingredients in any relationship.
4. If you're given a task, do it well.
5. If you're given any responsibility, be accountable for it.
6. Don't force someone to like/love you, if they really care for you, it will come naturally.
7. Be mature to face all types of challenges that come your way.
8. You learn things from your mistakes or from your past experience, treasure it.
9. Enjoy life the way you want to live it as long as you know your limitations.
10. Have a sense of responsibility.
11. Have high respect for your parents and you will never go wrong.
12. Have more faith in Him and trust Him for all the happenings in your life whether it's bad or not. Everything happens according to His will.
13. Help those in need even strangers.
14. Show respect to all the people you deal with.
15. If you feel like giving up, kneel down and pray. Only Him who can give you assurance that "everything will be ok".
16. I love it when I make my loved ones happy. Make it a habit to make others happy.
17. Don't forget yourself. Learn to love yourself.
18. Never doubt yourself that you can do anything with the help of Almighty Father.
19. Reconnect to your long lost friends. Treasure the friendship.
20. Share your blessings.
21. Have someone in your life who can be trusted of all the things you are going through. It relieves when you get to release the burden in your heart.
22. Have "me" time. Know yourself deeper.
23. Write the things you want in life. Your goals. Your dreams. Before you know it, you have achieved it already.
24. Be grounded. Be humble.
25. Have a grateful heart.
26. Focus on things you like to achieve.
27. Be kind always.
28. Try things out of your comfort zone.
29. Be a good listener.
30. Be vocal about your feelings.
31. If you are sad, let it be. Anyway, it will pass.
32. Look back to where you came from and be grateful to those people who have helped you become the person you are now.
33. Be patient to your kids. Let them play and enjoy their childhood.
34. Fulfill your long-time dream.
35. Always make yourself happy.
36. Be patient to all other people you deal with.
37. Always pray for His guidance in everything that you do.
38. Be sensitive for the feelings of others.
39. Learn things from others' past experiences.
I thank God for giving me the kind of life I have right now, for the gift of family, for being the person I am now. I pray for good health, more happiness, peace of mind, lots of love for me, my family, my friends and those who are in need.
Tuesday, February 14, 2017
Motherhood or Wifehood?
Motherhood is one of the best feelings I've ever experienced and still enjoying it. But most of the time, my patience always put to the test, given that I have 2 boys, still motherhood is a great feeling and very fulfilling. For me, the essence of being a woman is being a mother but wait....I think I was wrong.
Before I became a mother, I was a wife first. Being a wife to my husband is one of the greatest feelings I've ever had. Not all the time, we're okay. We fight, we argue, we fight, we argue, then we fight again and we argue again...hahaha. The best part of it is at the end of the day, we know how to say sorry, accept our faults, forgive one another. This is so natural for us to do as we do it out of love. We cannot let each other feel bad all the time. I am so blessed to have my husband in my life, he knows how to calm me down and comfort me.
Last night was the first time we didn't celebrate Valentine's day in our 10 years of being together. It was a surprise date, he called me in the afternoon to say that we're going to have our dinner together. To prepare for that, I left the office early enough to pick up my Kuya Kiel from school to finish our review session for his quiz the following day. I didn't foresee that our review will take time longer than I expected. Until such time, that the reservation for our dinner date was forfeited. Yes, my hubby reserved and paid for it already. So sad. I was torn between motherhood and wifehood. I was told before that my husband should always be my priority, next is my kids. Last night, I felt guilty about it. I just ruined my husband's plans to celebrate our Valentine's day. We're okay now and he said sorry too because of his reaction last night for what happened. I fully understand what he felt last night, I felt guilty about it. I can't leave my son at home saying that he is not yet ready for the quiz, so I chose to stay and taught him about the lesson.
I realized I should have prioritized my husband. I was amazed with what my husband did early this morning, he talked to me and said sorry. He fully understand my situation last night where I was torn between him and my son. He realized that what I did was okay. Now, I was too emotional how this guy can easily forgive me for what I did. God is really good to fill my heart with so much love from the people I love especially from my husband.
Thank you tatay for your never ending patience, love and care. Thank you for everything. I love you so much! This is for you, this is how we started. Love you tatay.
Before I became a mother, I was a wife first. Being a wife to my husband is one of the greatest feelings I've ever had. Not all the time, we're okay. We fight, we argue, we fight, we argue, then we fight again and we argue again...hahaha. The best part of it is at the end of the day, we know how to say sorry, accept our faults, forgive one another. This is so natural for us to do as we do it out of love. We cannot let each other feel bad all the time. I am so blessed to have my husband in my life, he knows how to calm me down and comfort me.
Last night was the first time we didn't celebrate Valentine's day in our 10 years of being together. It was a surprise date, he called me in the afternoon to say that we're going to have our dinner together. To prepare for that, I left the office early enough to pick up my Kuya Kiel from school to finish our review session for his quiz the following day. I didn't foresee that our review will take time longer than I expected. Until such time, that the reservation for our dinner date was forfeited. Yes, my hubby reserved and paid for it already. So sad. I was torn between motherhood and wifehood. I was told before that my husband should always be my priority, next is my kids. Last night, I felt guilty about it. I just ruined my husband's plans to celebrate our Valentine's day. We're okay now and he said sorry too because of his reaction last night for what happened. I fully understand what he felt last night, I felt guilty about it. I can't leave my son at home saying that he is not yet ready for the quiz, so I chose to stay and taught him about the lesson.
I realized I should have prioritized my husband. I was amazed with what my husband did early this morning, he talked to me and said sorry. He fully understand my situation last night where I was torn between him and my son. He realized that what I did was okay. Now, I was too emotional how this guy can easily forgive me for what I did. God is really good to fill my heart with so much love from the people I love especially from my husband.
Thank you tatay for your never ending patience, love and care. Thank you for everything. I love you so much! This is for you, this is how we started. Love you tatay.
Thursday, January 12, 2017
Random Thoughts
Why is it so hard for me to write here nowadays? I had so much thoughts in my mind but I wasn't able to put it here.
My thoughts are not organized. I feel like I am always nervous, I always worry for small stuff, I always have negative thoughts. When people do good to me, I always think it's not sincere or maybe she/he just needs something from me. Why is it always like that? Is this what you called "midlife crisis"?
From Wikepedia:
A midlife crisis is a transition of identity and self-confidence that can occur in middle aged individuals. It is a psychological and behavioral observation that commonly occurs with individuals between the ages 45-64. Its observations differ in a diverse manner for each individual. While some individuals may experience feelings of depression, remorse, and anxiety, others may experience feelings such as the desire to achieve youthfulness or make drastic changes to their current lifestyle or atmosphere.
What???!!! It occurs with individuals between ages 45-64... I am not even at my 40s... I think I need to change something with my lifestyle, with my relationship with God, with the people I love. This 2017, I target to achieve the following goals:
1. Have a strong relationship with God. I always forget to give thanks to Him for He is the driver of our lives. Everything in my life now is based on His will and He is in control of everything I have. I should treasure and enjoy the life He provides us.
2. Have a more quality time with my immediate family (tatay, kuya Kiel and Ethan). Whenever we're together, I should lessen being stressful dealing with them. I easily get irritated whenever things do not happen according to my expectations. This is too bad. I should control my temper and be more patient when dealing with them.
3. Have a healthy life. Tatay and I are not getting any younger, we should now push ourselves to have an active lifestyle together, we need to promote with each other to eat healthy food so we could also influence our kids to do the same.
4. Have a baby girl. I just realized that I think this is too late for us to plan to have a baby girl, I will be 39 this July. We should have planned it when Ethan was still 2 or 3 yrs old. In God's time, we claim that we will have that mini "Irene" this year.
5. Have a good disposition in life. Basically, I owe this to my hubby in which he taught me how to approach things that come my way. He has the right attitude towards different circumstances in life. I just love how he does it and I admire him for being focused in everything he does.
6. Have the means to provide for our needs. Not rich and not poor, just in the middle. At least we could provide our kids the lives that they deserve and at the same, have the means to share with the people we love and the people in need.
I claim that this 2017 will be a great year for all of us! God bless everyone.
My thoughts are not organized. I feel like I am always nervous, I always worry for small stuff, I always have negative thoughts. When people do good to me, I always think it's not sincere or maybe she/he just needs something from me. Why is it always like that? Is this what you called "midlife crisis"?
From Wikepedia:
A midlife crisis is a transition of identity and self-confidence that can occur in middle aged individuals. It is a psychological and behavioral observation that commonly occurs with individuals between the ages 45-64. Its observations differ in a diverse manner for each individual. While some individuals may experience feelings of depression, remorse, and anxiety, others may experience feelings such as the desire to achieve youthfulness or make drastic changes to their current lifestyle or atmosphere.
What???!!! It occurs with individuals between ages 45-64... I am not even at my 40s... I think I need to change something with my lifestyle, with my relationship with God, with the people I love. This 2017, I target to achieve the following goals:
1. Have a strong relationship with God. I always forget to give thanks to Him for He is the driver of our lives. Everything in my life now is based on His will and He is in control of everything I have. I should treasure and enjoy the life He provides us.
2. Have a more quality time with my immediate family (tatay, kuya Kiel and Ethan). Whenever we're together, I should lessen being stressful dealing with them. I easily get irritated whenever things do not happen according to my expectations. This is too bad. I should control my temper and be more patient when dealing with them.
3. Have a healthy life. Tatay and I are not getting any younger, we should now push ourselves to have an active lifestyle together, we need to promote with each other to eat healthy food so we could also influence our kids to do the same.
4. Have a baby girl. I just realized that I think this is too late for us to plan to have a baby girl, I will be 39 this July. We should have planned it when Ethan was still 2 or 3 yrs old. In God's time, we claim that we will have that mini "Irene" this year.
5. Have a good disposition in life. Basically, I owe this to my hubby in which he taught me how to approach things that come my way. He has the right attitude towards different circumstances in life. I just love how he does it and I admire him for being focused in everything he does.
6. Have the means to provide for our needs. Not rich and not poor, just in the middle. At least we could provide our kids the lives that they deserve and at the same, have the means to share with the people we love and the people in need.
I claim that this 2017 will be a great year for all of us! God bless everyone.
Monday, August 29, 2016
Family Time over Other things
It's been a long while since I had my last blog entry. It was about my #sepanx (separation anxiety) moment with my former employer. I thought I could have more time to write since I will no longer have a 9-hour regular office work everyday. But I was wrong, I was fooled by my thoughts of having more "me" time, more time to write about life, motherhood, challenges etc. etc.
Then, I became an SAHM (stay at home mom) from Feb to Apr 2016, I never had a time to check my blogsite (naks! pumi-feeling blogger talaga haha, hayaan na, pagbigyan!) and sit down to organize my thoughts then let it document here. This never happened.
Fast forward, I started a new job last May 2016 then I quit effective July 29. This was too fast, yeah I know. So many realizations, I thought I can let my day pass without kissing my sons "good night", I thought I can let them do their homework without my supervision, I thought I can let them review on their own during quizzes, exams. This time, I was right, my kids were able to do their homework, review their lessons on their own but I felt guilty about it, I never had a quality time with them after office hours (super duper extended working hours). Aside from my nanay duties, my duties as a wife had suffered already. So I realized there's something wrong, I need to do something about it. So, finally, I realized my priority is my family. I will never trade my family time for a well-compensated job but offers me to have little time to spend with the people I love the most. I decided to quit my job at that time.
Looking forward to work again with my former employer. Yeah you read it right, "with my former employer".
Then, I became an SAHM (stay at home mom) from Feb to Apr 2016, I never had a time to check my blogsite (naks! pumi-feeling blogger talaga haha, hayaan na, pagbigyan!) and sit down to organize my thoughts then let it document here. This never happened.
Fast forward, I started a new job last May 2016 then I quit effective July 29. This was too fast, yeah I know. So many realizations, I thought I can let my day pass without kissing my sons "good night", I thought I can let them do their homework without my supervision, I thought I can let them review on their own during quizzes, exams. This time, I was right, my kids were able to do their homework, review their lessons on their own but I felt guilty about it, I never had a quality time with them after office hours (super duper extended working hours). Aside from my nanay duties, my duties as a wife had suffered already. So I realized there's something wrong, I need to do something about it. So, finally, I realized my priority is my family. I will never trade my family time for a well-compensated job but offers me to have little time to spend with the people I love the most. I decided to quit my job at that time.
Looking forward to work again with my former employer. Yeah you read it right, "with my former employer".
Tuesday, January 12, 2016
#dramaqueenever
I thought I was ok, I thought I had moved on but then again, now that I look back, all I can say is "Whew! How I wish I could make it last but it was already final and I cannot bring back the past." I thought I succeeded all the stages of moving on (these are my own stages, others may have different stages on how to move on, I guess it varies based on personality).
1. Denial: You cannot imagine yourself losing the relationship that you put so much time, effort and love to make it last. Sadly, it didn't work the way you wanted it to be.
2. Anger: Hated the situation. Why did it happen? You thought the relationship is smooth, suddenly, the situation changed.
3. Grieving: Since you parted ways, you can't help but grieve. Sad :(
4. Acceptance: Accepted the situation and believed that you can't bring back the past. Past is past and you totally have accepted it.
I thought I was done with these stages where I have reached the Acceptance stage already.
Now, as my end date with Cypress (Yes, this is about my relationship with Cypress as employer-employee relationship) is coming so soon, I can't help but feel sad about it. I grew up with this Company personally and professionally. I gained friends and encountered difficult people as well. These were the people who have helped me and made me stronger to face any kind of challenges. I thank them for being part of my journey. (huhuhu!!!)
Thank You Cypress for the time we've spent together. You've been so generous and I'm grateful that I was able to enjoy it and share it with the people I love.
God bless our journey! :)
1. Denial: You cannot imagine yourself losing the relationship that you put so much time, effort and love to make it last. Sadly, it didn't work the way you wanted it to be.
2. Anger: Hated the situation. Why did it happen? You thought the relationship is smooth, suddenly, the situation changed.
3. Grieving: Since you parted ways, you can't help but grieve. Sad :(
4. Acceptance: Accepted the situation and believed that you can't bring back the past. Past is past and you totally have accepted it.
I thought I was done with these stages where I have reached the Acceptance stage already.
Now, as my end date with Cypress (Yes, this is about my relationship with Cypress as employer-employee relationship) is coming so soon, I can't help but feel sad about it. I grew up with this Company personally and professionally. I gained friends and encountered difficult people as well. These were the people who have helped me and made me stronger to face any kind of challenges. I thank them for being part of my journey. (huhuhu!!!)
Thank You Cypress for the time we've spent together. You've been so generous and I'm grateful that I was able to enjoy it and share it with the people I love.
God bless our journey! :)
Wednesday, November 11, 2015
Two Years Ago..
It's already Nov 2015, time flies so fast. Two years ago, our yaya for 4 months left us. At first, it was so hard for my hubby and I to wake up everyday so early to prepare the breakfast, packed lunch for kids, give my kids a bath, bring our Kuya Kiel to school, bring Ethan to lola's house, clean and wash the dishes after breakfast etc etc etc...
With that chores, my hubby and I were able to manage to do it on our own without the help of a yaya for 2 years and counting. I cannot do it alone without the help of my loving hubby. I super thank God for giving me such a wonderful husband who knows how to cook, wash the dishes etc. etc.. (it looks like it's my hubby pala who does the chores...hahaha)
This was our everyday routine:
4:30am-5:15 - Prepare breakfast, baon.
5:15-6am - Nanay's bath time then, nanay will give kuya a bath.
6-6:15am - Breakfast time with tatay.
6:20am - Tatay brings kuya to school.
6:21-7:30am - Nanay cleans the kitchen and wash the dishes.
7:30am - Nanay brings Ethan to lola's house.
7:45 - Nanay goes to office.
We changed our schedule since the start of this month. I will be reporting to one of the subsidiaries of Cypress located in Laguna Technopark (LTI) until Jan 2016. The location is near to our home :)
4-4:15am - Nanay's bath time.
4:15-5:15am - Prepare breakfast and baon.
5:15-5:30am - Breakfast time.
5:31-6am - Kuya's bath time and getting ready for school.
6:10-6:20am - We leave the house to bring Kuya to school. Yipppeee! this is now my new role, my son's driver going to school... :) Then, I go straight to the office (LTI). Wow! so early in the office.
6:21am - It's tatay's turn to clean the kitchen, wash the dishes, bring Ethan to Lola's house....hehe Love you tatay for doing this since we don't have a yaya.
I am blessed to have my husband, my partner in everything I do. I cannot do it on my own. Thank you and love you so much tatay.
Also, thanks to my in-laws for taking good care of our kids while we're working.
Thank God for giving me a wonderful family :) #blessed
With that chores, my hubby and I were able to manage to do it on our own without the help of a yaya for 2 years and counting. I cannot do it alone without the help of my loving hubby. I super thank God for giving me such a wonderful husband who knows how to cook, wash the dishes etc. etc.. (it looks like it's my hubby pala who does the chores...hahaha)
This was our everyday routine:
4:30am-5:15 - Prepare breakfast, baon.
5:15-6am - Nanay's bath time then, nanay will give kuya a bath.
6-6:15am - Breakfast time with tatay.
6:20am - Tatay brings kuya to school.
6:21-7:30am - Nanay cleans the kitchen and wash the dishes.
7:30am - Nanay brings Ethan to lola's house.
7:45 - Nanay goes to office.
We changed our schedule since the start of this month. I will be reporting to one of the subsidiaries of Cypress located in Laguna Technopark (LTI) until Jan 2016. The location is near to our home :)
4-4:15am - Nanay's bath time.
4:15-5:15am - Prepare breakfast and baon.
5:15-5:30am - Breakfast time.
5:31-6am - Kuya's bath time and getting ready for school.
6:10-6:20am - We leave the house to bring Kuya to school. Yipppeee! this is now my new role, my son's driver going to school... :) Then, I go straight to the office (LTI). Wow! so early in the office.
6:21am - It's tatay's turn to clean the kitchen, wash the dishes, bring Ethan to Lola's house....hehe Love you tatay for doing this since we don't have a yaya.
I am blessed to have my husband, my partner in everything I do. I cannot do it on my own. Thank you and love you so much tatay.
Also, thanks to my in-laws for taking good care of our kids while we're working.
Thank God for giving me a wonderful family :) #blessed
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